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3 Reason why it's the perfect choice might be holding you back




Some people have a hard time making a decision because they are waiting for the perfect option to appear.   One of the things that keep us from making a choice is our own limiting beliefs. 


Limiting beliefs are beliefs and assumptions that we accumulate through life which might be limiting our happiness and accomplishments. We all have those, but in some cases certain limiting beliefs speak really loud. A big one when it comes to choices is expecting things to be perfect before taking the opportunity or making that decision.  We want to choose the perfect job, the perfect partner, or the perfect house. How often does the perfect option appear? Most of the time that perfect option doesn't exist. We tend to think that if we wait that option will show up. The problem with this scenario is that the longer we wait the more chances we have that those opportunities available at the moment will disappear. The same way we can't rewind time, we can't bring back the opportunities that passed us by.  Then we regret the fact that we didn't make a choice when we could. The truth is, we did. We made the choice to do nothing.


 Another problem with waiting for the perfect choice is that you’re creating a tunnel vision where you can't see all the opportunities available to you.  Sometimes the perfect option is not there yet, but by embracing an opportunity presented to you, you are moving closer to what you want.  When you create a tunnel vision, you classify things into two categories, it's either perfect or not. In coaching we also call this the All-or-Nothing thinking. In reality, there are many options in between the all and the nothing out there which we are ignoring. Think of it as a soccer game (or lacrosse, football, handball, etc.). You want to score a goal but can't get past the midfield. By looking around the field to where your players are, you find one of the wings wide open. You cross him the ball and he scores a beautiful goal for your team. Mission accomplished.  Be open to seeing the possibilities out there just waiting for you.


Lastly, we don't realize that what is perfect at one point might not be perfect in the long run. Things change constantly and we change with them.  We grow, we evolve.  It's okay to dream of being an astronaut when in high school and changing your mind to being a mathematician when you get to college. The partner who seemed perfect for you at 25, might not be the one you want to spend your life with 5 years later. An ideal situation is like the line of the horizon. It might be there to give us a direction, but it's never a destination. Use your values as a compass but don't get stuck on getting perfect. Also, be aware that the ideal is truly yours and you're not letting yourself follow someone else's compass. What's considered perfect for one person doesn't necessarily make that perfect for another.


So, if you need to make a choice, open your eyes and look for all the options out there. Brainstorm solutions with colleagues, friends and family to see if they can see something you can't.


Contemplate if any of the options available at this moment can get you closer to what you would consider the perfect option. Notice how what was perfect for you 10 years ago has changed. Keep in mind that life is constantly changing and when you get the perfect option it might not be so perfect after all. And don't forget, not choosing is a choice in itself.

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